The Vacuum Cleaner Monster

Picture this: I was expecting guests on Thursday. Some friends of mine were coming from out of town to spend the night at our house. Seeing as it was only two days after Christmas, my house was in desperate need of cleaning and I had been putting it off for days. Stephanie and her husband Stephen had left that morning and I wasn't expecting them to be there for at least another hour. I got to work cleaning my living room and had vacuumed the rug when my Mom called. We chatted for a bit and when the conversation was over, I put my cell phone in my pocket and went back to work. The plan was that Steph and Stephen were going to sleep on the living room floor and I got to thinking that they were going to see right under my couches and it was pretty dusty under there. I got my vacuum cleaner hose out and kneeled on the floor reaching back under my couch to get those dust bunnies. Suddenly my hair was yanked back and right up into the vacuum. You cannot turn the beater bar off on our vacuum, so when you use the hose, it keeps spinning. When I leaned over to reach under the couch, I was too close to the vacuum and now my hair was tightly wrapped around the beater bar. I turned off the vacuum and tugged on my hair. Nope. It was stuck. All I could think of was the horror stories I've heard of during the 1800's when the girls working in factories would get their hair caught in the machines and get dragged right into them. Yikes... This wasn't that bad, but I was stuck. I was curled up in a little ball on the living room floor with my hair wrapped up into the vacuum. Good thing that I had just been talking to my Mom. I got my cell out of my pocket. She only lives ten minutes away and she has a key to get in my house. (I keep my doors locked.) I call her up... "Mom, I need help. My hair is stuck in the vacuum." I could only imagine what she was thinking. She assures me that help is on the way. Meanwhile, Josh, who is in the baby swing, starts crying and Molly (my dog) is sniffing my head wondering what was wrong with me. Tears start to flow and I feel pretty helpless trying to get comfortable on the floor. My phone rings and Mom tells me that Dad is on his way. Right after we hung up for the second time, my phone rings again. It was Stephanie. "Hi Bethy! I think we're at your house. Can you open the door?" I answer with, "I can't." I'm choking back tears mixed with laughter as I tell her why I cannot come to the door. And boy, do I feel really dumb now. She's trying to think of how she can help me, but since the doors are all locked, that'd be useless. I figure that I'd better try to carry the vacuum to the door to unlock it. Good thing I don't have a Kirby because then it would've been much harder to carry. I manage to turn the vacuum upside down and make it to the door. I must've looked like quite the sight when she came in. My face is damp with tears and my hair... Josh is crying quite fiercely by now. Stephanie unwinds my hair from the bar and somehow I'm not as embarrassed as I thought I would be. I think she and her hubby felt sorry for me and I have to admit, it was the joke of their stay. My head had a nice egg on it from my hair being pulled so hard and I lost a small clump of hair, but we hadn't had to cut any of my hair, for which I am grateful. We put the vacuum away for the rest of their visit.