Thursday, April 12, 2007

Punctuation Buffs Wanted

Hello there... This Saturday I start taking some really cool classes and I'm supposed to bring along a paragraph on any topic. This paragraph needs to be at least six sentences long and contain an introductory sentence and a concluding sentence. The purpose of the paragraph is just to make sure I know how to write properly. Well, I just wanted a little assurance of my punctuation and decided to post my paragraph just the way I wrote it so you all can critique my grammar, punctuation and spelling. So take it away... I think I did okay, but who knows... Maybe one of you was really good at English and has a little insight that I have forgotten. So here goes.

Life, for me, is about to change quite drastically. This past month my husband and I found out that we are expecting our first child. After experiencing a disheartening miscarriage in November, we were both a bit apprehensive when we found out that we were pregnant again. I felt that I needed to stifle any anticipation of becoming a mom until we were past the initial danger zone. Yes, dealing with morning sickness and a growing waistline should've been enough to counteract my biggest concerns; yet, it wasn't quite enough. It wasn't until this past Wednesday that I could feel at ease. Hearing my baby's heartbeat for the first time and realizing that he or she was truely growing inside of me was what finally made me relaxe. Becoming a mommy for the first time is actually turning out to be very exciting!

Now that I'm done I see a few things I could change. Do you see them too?

10 comments:

Rachel said...

I wouldn't put a comma in the first sentence after "Life" or after "for me". Also, "relax" doesn't need an e on the end (that's toward the end of your paragraph) I think it's a great paragraph! I have a tough time knowing where to and where not to put commas, so I may be wrong.

Uncle Dave said...

Bethany, I think you are correct on the first sentence, so don't listen to Aunt Rachel. Also, I know it's politically correct, but in your second sentence you said that Adam is pregnant. He isn't, is he? ;-) That would be really amazing. I think if it is for a class it should be "we are expecting" or "I am pregnant". Also, I'm not great with semicolons, but I think it should just be "concerns, yet it wasn't quite enough." Well, that's it for my critiques. I hope you don't get marked off because of me.

Rachel said...

Oh, I see! I was reading that first sentence different than Uncle Dave. He explained it to me. See I'm not all that smart, so please don't take my advice on punctuation.

Martha said...

Now you can "truly relax".

Joe Fool said...

Im not, Good at pucTuation"

Anonymous said...

Oh Bethany, Bethany...I think I have it worked out now...so I can make comments and all that stuff...it has taken sooo long and I have attempted this many many times...I write long notes(as your well aware that I can do)and try to send and they go no place...but I think I have it worked out and all I want to say over and over is..oh..# 1...do not attempt to correct my caps..spelling..punctuation or anything as you will be totally frustrated...I yam hooo I yam..and thats all that I yam...# 2...I am all excited..wiggling like a spazed out worm...jumpiing for joy, squeeling etc...I am sooooo happy fer you...wow!eee! WOW! your having a baby...WOW! I have been so excited about that...thrilled with your call..and can't wait to get there and take more pictures..I just sent some of GramaGail and you..when she first arrived for your wedding day...Gramagail is sooo excited also...CONGRATULATIONS SOOOOO MUCH!...OOOOEEEEE! EEEEEHA!

Anonymous said...

oh...yes...for now until I get everything worked out here...my name shall remain anonymous...but you can call my anony, anny..or annie...or gramanitaany or anything you want...but as you know only toooo well..never late (you know what I'm gona say eh!?) for dinner! Love you anony

Priscilla said...

Everyone else beat me to it.

Bethany said...

Thanks for your help everybody... And Uncle Dave might be pleased to know that I wrote it correctly on paper (we are expecting) but messed up when I copied it onto the blog... Ooops.

And I was wondering about the semi-colon thing too.

Michelle-ozark crafter said...

I am afraid I am not much help. I am not so good at these things! LOL!