Crazy Hair

Do you think it's time for a haircut?

Bigger and Bigger

"Mom, do you wanna do puzzles?" "Wanna read a book?" "Mommy, sing Jesus Loves Me." "I peed." "Can I wash dishes?" "Cat! Be good!" "Thank you Mommy, for fixing it."

His little voice sometimes just gets to me. I want to keep it in a box, so I play it later when his little voice has long since said it's last good-bye. I love it when he sings to me or with me. I almost want him to stay two forever, but I know each new faze is exciting in it's own way. This morning we played a rousing game of hide-and-seek together. I ran from one end of the house to the other, crouching and ducking here and there, all the while being chased by a small giggling boy. This afternoon I plan to take him outside to play in the snow. That is, if he ever goes to sleep and gets his nap over with. We received well over a foot of heavy, wet snow last night, perfect for making snowmen or sledding down the snow banks. Josh has only been sledding once and we've never made a snowman together. (Last year's doesn't really count, as he didn't help me one bit.) I know it'll be a chore to get on all of our snow clothes and tromp through the three foot drifts, but it's be worth it once we reach the open yard. We could build the biggest snow man together. I'm getting chills just thinking about it. (Hurry Josh! Fall asleep, so you can be done with your nap. Then we can go play outside together!!) I want to enjoy each moment I can with this little guy.

Getting There...

Oh, and so far this week, I have accomplished some of my goal list. I hung a painting (three cheers!) and learned a new Spanish word. Invierno means winter. Last week I only learned three new words. Does that mean I have to learn seven this week to make up for it? Last weeks new words were: amistad/friendship, ejemplo/example, and chicles/gum. I also found that our library has several Spanish children's books and they lable them with a red sticker on the binding, so they are easy to find. So even though I no longer have an instant "Facebook connection" to my Spanish speaking friends, I can still learn new words from the kid's books at the library.

Adios Amigos

Last week I retired from Facebook. It was a tough thing to do. Or rather it IS a tough thing to do. But I felt like the Lord wanted me to cut it out of my life, even if it is only for a time. I'm not sure yet if it is just for a time or if it is a more long term commitment. I must admit, I really love Facebook. It gives me a connection to my family who lives far away (including my brother in MN), helps me stay in touch with people I met while in El Salvador, reconnects me with family friends who have moved out of state and even gives me an instant connection to a girl I sponsor through Compassion. So you can imagine what agony it has been following through with my convictions. But I have found that, because of Facebook, my relationships with my close friends have been floundering. I have become a more shallow friend, apt to drop you a quick line on your Facebook wall, rather than pick up the phone and call or invite you over for supper. I have become a stalker. I have become a lazy housewife. I ignore my duties as keeper of my home. My piles of laundry have become heaps. The dust bunnies have become dust lions. In the evening, I will get on Facebook before I dig into my evening read in the Psalms, leaving me too tired to concentrate by the time I open my Bible. I would rather ignore my husband (even though he is watching TV) and zone into the world of "who's doing what", than snuggle next to him on the couch. So the good has been weighed against the bad. I prefer life before Facebook. Where a phone call was anxiously awaited and a good letter waiting for me in the mailbox wasn't so far and few between. Where people actually talked to each other and got to know each other, rather than just reading bits and snippets of each other's lives. Where my priorities were just a bit closer to lining up where they should be. My tendency to abuse the privilege of the instant connection to the lives of those I love, has brought me to this place. Now I wonder how so and so will keep in touch with me? And how will I be able to hear from this or that person? But I follow the conviction the Lord has placed on my heart, trusting that He really does know what I need. After all, He really does. So good-bye Facebook. Hello blog. Hello housework. Hello family.

Matthew 19:29 And every one that has forsaken houses, or brothers, or sisters, or father, or mother, or wife, or children, or lands, [or Facebook] for my name's sake, shall receive an hundred times, and shall inherit everlasting life.

Six Goals to Work Toward

So, I'm working on setting some goals and I hope to encourage you to keep me responsible. I have a small list of weekly/monthly goals to work towards.

• Write two blogs a week. Mom I expect you to keep track of me.
• Exercise twice a week. I delegate Aunt Priscilla to check in with me weekly to make sure I do so. (That's what you get when you suggest a 5K run.)
• Learn five new Spanish words a week. So far I have learned one and I have two days left in this week. "Amistad" means friendship. I have enough Spanish-speaking friends to have them give me words to learn, but I may be somewhat on my own on this.
  
• Read one new book each month. I think I'll start this in March.
• I also want to take at least five photos of Josh each week. I don't think I've taken any decent photos of Josh in weeks.
• Accomplish one task at home each week that generally goes undone for months. Like hanging photos or painting the stairway. Simple enough to do, but for some reason just doesn't happen.

This week the only thing I can check off so far is the "Write two blogs" goal. I can still learn four new words, take five photos and hang a photo. Maybe I can even start that book that has been lying on my bed stand for the past two months. I don't know about exercising though. I need REAL motivation to do that. It will be so much easier when the snow is gone for the season. But until then, I will have to drive to the gym. Yuck.

Thinking About and Reaching Goals

So my goal this year is to have at least 100 posts by the end of the year. So far, I stink at reaching goals. Maybe I could change my life around, eh? Lately I've been doing a lot of thinking. I think about cleaning the house. I think about my flabby thighs. I think about Valentines Day and how it is a stupid holiday. I think about being more creative and energetic. I think about reading my Bible more. I think about learning Spanish. I think about El Salvador. I think about Joshua. I think about the future. I think about life. There's just plum a lot to think about around here!

Sometimes I need a little motivation to do the things that I've always wanted to do. Maybe a friend who is doing the same thing or who will keep on top of you until something is accomplished. So my challenge to you is to challenge me to do things. I feel like a fat, lazy blob (who is also boring) who needs a kick in the butt to actually be the creative person I enjoy being. So, I am bracing myself for that first kick...

Heart Thoughts

It's been a week... On one hand, a good week. On the other, a trying week. This week I have spent an ample amount of time painting the staircase to our basement. It's the last part to be done for our basement project, with the exception of tiling behind out wood stove, which may never happen. I have crouched high and bent low to paint all the surrounding molding, risers, nooks and crannies, caulked till my fingers were raw, and still have more to do. But seeing progress for the first time in a month and a half is encouraging. This is the good portion of my week.

The trying part is more an emotional straining than anything, and I'm not even sure if I can call it that. I have found myself mourning the loss of a man I only met a handful of times and never spoke much more than a few dozen words to. The length of time between our meetings were long and that made any attempt at conversation especially awkward. When I was young, a grandfather was a man to be loved and cherished, even if he lived on the other side of the country. A man to be adored no matter how little you knew of him, a man who's attention you desired to seek and to obtain. I think as a person grows older, those childlike desires begin to wax and wane with time, especially if they go long untended. Having only met my paternal Grandfather maybe 5 times over the course of my life, I feel distanced from his passing, yet strangely disconcerted by it. My heart is sad and I wish I had known more of my Grandpa. I wish I had the opportunity to love him and to know him, as I had with my other Grandpa. And yet, maybe it is a blessing, in an odd, selfish way, because I'm not sure my heart could handle losing two such men so close together. I hurt for Grandpa Jim's family, for his adopted daughter, for his wife and his children. They are in my heart and in my prayers. And somehow, no matter how distant we actually were, I still loved that man. Good-bye my Grandpa Jim..... May 26, 1938-February 4, 2010